CELEBRITY IN CHIEF BARRY O HAS STILL NOT SOLVED OR REALLY EVEN ADDRESSED THE GULF COAST DISASTER BUT TODAY HE HAS ANNOUNCED HE WILL BE FORMING A PRESENTIAL COMMISSION TO STUDY THE ISSUE.
AND WHILE THEY STUDY THE ISSUE, 32 DAYS AFTER THE DISASTER BEGAN, B.P. CONTINUES TO DESTROY THE ENVIRONMENT.
THESE REPORTERS OBTAINED AN EXCLUSIVE AGENDA FOR THE COMMISSION'S 1ST THIRTY DAYS:
1) DEBATE TITLES AND RANK AND BATHROOM SCHEDULE.
2) ASSIGN SOMEONE TO FETCH COFFEE.
3) HOLD DIRTIEST JOKE COMPETITION.
4) POSSIBLE RUN OFF FOR JOKE COMPETITION.
5) HAND OUT RIBBONS AND ONE TROPHY FOR COMPETITION.
6) DEBATE WHETHER TO EAT CHINESE OR PIZZA.
7) DEBATE WHETHER BATHROOM BREAK SCHEDULE IS FAIR.
FROM THE TCI WIRE:
community continued to report human rights abuses and violations against civilians by militias, criminal gangs, and security forces, with perpetrators generally avoiding prosecution.
* In Iraq, displaced women heading households on their own faced higher risks of sexual exploitation than women who were accompanied by men.
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