Thursday, September 29, 2005

Dating, pioneers

That’s the way it goes I’m guessing. I was all ready to get on and find out that Blogger is down. I called Elaine to make sure she was seeing the same thing I was seeing and she was.
I told her I’d go into Microsoft Word and do my post and if she wanted to take the night off that was cool. She picks up Wednesdays for me. That’s a church night and you’ll probably never find anything here on a Wednesday night. So always just head on over to Like Maria Said Paz.

So we have a new blogger in the community. His name is Seth and he blogs at Seth in the City. I had planned to add him to my blogroll but now I don’t know. Blogger being down really screws up my plans. I’d thought I’d do an entry and then head on out for dinner at my aunt’s. We’re all going there because my cousin just got engaged.

This isn’t a formal dinner. That’ll come tomorrow night. But my aunt wanted to have everyone over from my cousin’s side of the family. I don’t know about other people and maybe I’m the only one who ever feels this way but . . .

I’m glad for my cousin. He’s got a great woman who loves him and she’s got a great man who loves her. I have no problem being with them. But I do have a problem being with the family during events like this because I’ll hear, "When are you getting married?"

When I find the right woman. Haven’t found her and I’m not desperate to. I date and there are some nice ladies but it’s just not been where you think, "Okay, I want to spend all my life with her."

I said that to this aunt last time when another cousin got married this summer and she grabbed pen and paper and started saying we were going to make a list and then find me someone. I don’t think you go shopping with a list. It happens when it happens.

If I was shopping, it would be probably someone like Betty and that’s not me trying to make a clumsy pass. But Betty’s the sort of woman if I was looking for a type and not that moment when you know "This is the one." She’s pretty, she’s got a great laugh, she’s obviously great with her kids and she’s just really interested in the world.

I can find pretty and beautiful real easy. But it’s not that easy to find someone who’s interested in the world. Two weeks ago, I was out with a woman and she said she’d heard I liked current events. I’m sure my eyebrows shot up because I know I was eager to hear what she was going to talk about.

Turns out that she wanted to talk about this man who’d killed someone or someones in his family. So I listen and wait thinking she’s going to talk about domestic abuse or something like that. But all she did was talk about the gruesome details. She says, "And I love CSI!"
So that date went no where. I don’t care for CSI and you can read Ava & C.I.’s review of CSI Miami to figure out why. I just don’t like those shows and the way we’re supposed to root for the trampling of people’s rights. 24 is just disgusting and I can’t stand that show either.

But I’m not someone who thinks talking about blood stains on the carpet is talking about current events. Maybe I’m crazy or the only one who feels that way but that’s how I feel.
If she’d even done a Headline News kind of thing where she just tossed out factoids and didn’t offer anything of her own, I might have thought about asking her out again. But it was one hour and ten minutes about the crime scene and about her going, "I just can’t believe it! Can you believe it?" every five minutes.

Usually, when it’s obvious that I’m with someone who doesn’t know one thing about the world around them, I’ll try to talk about music. That’s a waste of time too. Unless I want to hear about Little Kim’s trial. Or probably this week, hear about Diana Ross’ DUI bust. Paul Mooney did a thing on that on BET this week. Maybe you saw it, maybe you didn’t. But I agreed with Steve Harvey about it being disrespectful to Tracee Ross who was sitting out front.

I also felt like, that was two years ago. Is that the best Mooney can do? A joke built around something that happened two years ago?

I’m sorry Diana Ross had a drinking problem. Since she’s not been arrested since, I’ll assume she’s gotten help.

But the woman’s been making music since the early 60s. She had her first hit in 1964. That’s over forty years of being a public personality. I don’t think one arrest is that big of a deal. Alcoholism is a disease and she obviously had a problem. It’s not really about who she is to the black community.

Even if Tracee Ross hadn’t been out there, I still would have thought Mooney was tasteless. I hear a lot of jokes about Smokey Robinson’s hairstyle in the Dr. Pepper commercials and it did look weird. If Mooney was doing a joke on Diana Ross like that, I might have laughed. But to pick a moment from two years ago that was disappointing and to be making fun of her like that. I just felt like he was crapping where he eats. He was coming and trashing someone who really broke barriers for us.

Glen Campbell got busted and they had crazy photos of him all over the net. That’s more recent. Why didn’t he make fun of Campbell?

It just seemed to me like there was a line and he crossed it.

There are nothing disappointments for African-Americans, he doesn’t have to dig two years back or try to burn a pioneer to get a cheap laugh. I quit watching Saturday Night Live because Maya Rudolph was always doing Diana Ross skits. I didn’t think they were funny or even well thought out. I felt like she thought, "I put on this wig and I play with the hair and act stupid and it’ll be so funny."

I wonder how she’d feel if that was Minnie Ripperton someone on Saturday Night Live was making fun of. In case anyone reading this doesn’t know, Minnie Ripperton was Maya Rudolph’s mother.

There are enough attacks on the black community without us needing to hear them from members of the community. Diana Ross was busted once. Why is it a big deal? Christian Slater’s been busted how many times and I don’t see people doing jokes about that. And Christian Slater’s not even a big star.

Diana Ross is a big thing. She never needs another hit, we’ll always know she came out in a time when black people didn’t have a lot of crossover success. She and the Supremes got on Ed Sullivan a lot. Her group was second only to the Beatles for having number 1s in the 60s. That’s a big thing. She went on to a solo career, had more hits, got an Oscar nomination (which Halle Berry didn’t mention in her long acceptance speech – probably the only woman Halle didn’t mention), raised three daughters into beautiful strong women and is still raising two sons.
There have been highs and lows but she’s like the black community, we keep on going. So hearing Paul Mooney dig two years into the past for stale jokes to attack a pioneer with just rubbed me the wrong way. I also felt sorry for her daughter Tracee who was in the audience with the camera on her while Mooney was mouthing off and making a jack ass of himself.

Steve Harvey said he would have slugged anyone who talked about his mother like that. I think if Tracee had done anything other than sit there, the press would have been all over it. If she’d gotten up and walked out, the headlines would be "Prima Dona Tracee Ross Storms Out of BET Celebration!" If she’d done like Harvey, it would have been "Tracee Ross? No, Trashy Ross! Ross Slugs Paul Mooney."

I think she was in a difficult situation and you saw that Ross and others in her family had taught her to hold her head high and conduct herself correctly. I don’t think there was anything else she could have done.

But I think Paul Moodey owes her an apology and I don’t think he was funny.

Blogger’s still not up. I didn’t plan to write about Tracee Ross tonight. I was going to do some links and note some stuff that members have been doing at their sites. But I’m going to have to hit the door in a bit. If I have to leave before Blogger’s up, I’ll post this when I get back. It’ll be late so I won’t be adding to it.

Go read Betty's "Thomas Friedman's Endgame Should Start With A Shower," Mike's interview with Betty, Rebecca's "Christine & Pop Politics" Ava & C..I.'s "TV Review: Three Wishes," Kat's "Kat's Korner: Stones Keep Rolling," Ruth's latest "Ruth's Morning Edition Report" and C.I.'s "Quick note." And Elaine's "The gloom of the world is but a shadow." She did that yesterday and it's amazing.

And let me just swipe from C.I. because I've got to run out the door.

From "'Why Are You Here' and 'What's Changed'" (The Third Estate Sunday Review's voices from the protests in D.C. article), we're again noting Benny with apologies that he was overlooked. Thanks to Shirley for catching that.
87) Benny, 17, high school student: For the first time it feels like maybe a difference can come. We're studying about government and it really seems wild and out there but it's about us and I guess Cindy Sheehan drives that point home to me. So I am here for that reason and the change is that people wake up and you can see it in my class. We're debating and discussing what does free speech mean and what are your duties to be an American and stuff that I have never taken time to think on and it just seems real and connected to me. Maybe it's selfish and all too because we got the guys on campus goin, "Sign up and we'll take care of you. Free college." All these promises and you ask about war and like injuries and they don't talk about it. They brush you off or say, "You just watch out for yourself and you're fine." And I bet the 1900 men and women who are dead were watching out but that didn't save them. So it's just a lot to think about and maybe having government this year drives it home.


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